Piggies and podcasts

Tags

bookmark, Cambridge 105, Heffers, indie publishing, piggy books, Richard Reynolds, Samuel Plank

I know this blog is usually about my fictional writing, but I do also write lots of non-fiction to do with my day job (which is anti-money laundering consultancy).  In fact, my first foray into indie publishing (which used to be called self-publishing) was with my non-fiction titles, and specifically a whole suite of books with pink pigs on the covers.  These “piggy books” explain the anti-money laundering requirements to directors and staff in various jurisdictions, and six of them deal specifically with the UK.  Where is she going with all of this blather, I hear you cry.

Well, whenever the money laundering legislation changes I have to update the piggy books, and at 8pm on Friday 20 December 2019 the UK government updated its money laundering legislation.  And the deadline for businesses to comply with this legislation is 10 January 2020.  Yes, that’s in about a fortnight’s time.  (We knew we’d have this deadline because the legislation is based on European legislation, but frankly – with the general election and concomitant awfulness – we assumed that the government would simply miss the European deadline, figuring that there’s little that Brussels can do to us now.)  Rushing out the legislation just before Christmas, and with no publicity to warn affected businesses, is plain slippery.  And – for me and my piggies – panic-inducing.

As a result, I spent the weekend before Christmas close-reading the new legislation, marking up the old legislation to highlight the changes, and then re-writing the relevant sections of all six UK piggies, before re-formatting them and re-publishing them.  It took three long days, as I was determined that anyone coming into work today would have a new piggy available to help them with the new legislation.  And how many have I sold so far?  Not a one.  Bah humbug.

On a much more positive note, just before the piggies and I went into silent retreat, I caught up with a podcast of one of my favourite on our local radio station.  “Bookmark” is broadcast every fortnight on Cambridge 105, and its topic is “books and writing with a local slant”.  I was particularly interested in the episode from 14 December 2019 as the crime buyer at Heffers bookshop – the sainted Richard Reynolds – was talking about his Christmas book recommendations, and I had a book token burning a hole in my pocket.  I was scribbling down his suggestions when (at 44:40, not that I’ve played it over and over again…) he mentioned me!  My Christmas cup runneth over.

Columns of columns

Tags

bookmark, Cambridge News, CreateSpace, formatting, Heffers, Susan in the City

Well, here they are, at long last: my first batch of copies of “Susan in the City” – a collection of eighty of the 510 columns that I wrote for my local newspaper over the last decade:

I ordered these from CreateSpace waaaaaaay back on 17 March 2017 and (thinking to save the pennies) chose the slowest and cheapest of the three delivery speeds, being quoted an arrival date of 9 May.  I will never do this again: with the budget delivery option there is no tracking, and so – from the moment I had the dispatch notification on 26 March – I was looking out for the books.  And they never arrived.  The ones you are looking at are the replacement order that CreateSpace put together when I complained on 11 May and sent by super-über-speedy delivery to arrive on 15 May.  I cannot tell you the hours of angst I have had over this delivery, and so my lesson for today is: never order books without a tracking option.

As for the books themselves, I am delighted with them and their lovely, sunny yellow covers.  The interior is good as well: cream paper, clear font and plenty of space (I do loathe books that use every inch of paper and force their text to the edges, so that you have to practically break the spine to read to the end of the lines).

So what is their fate?  Five were donated to the local newspaper, the Cambridge News – where the columns originally appeared – to serve as prizes in a reader competition.  I don’t know whether this will lead to further sales (I never know whether anything leads to further sales!) but I did slip a Plank bookmark inside each, just in case.

And five were delivered yesterday to Heffers, the bookshop in Cambridge that has always been so supportive and encouraging of my Plankish efforts.  They hinted that “Susan in the City” – having local interest – might even make it onto the oak table.  The oak table is, as you might imagine, a large oak table and it is right at the front of the shop – in pole position, as Hamilton and Vettel might say.  Nothing I have written has ever appeared on the oak table, so I have everything crossed that the sunshine yellow might seal the deal.  If it does, rest assured that photos will appear.

Party for poison pens

Tags

bookmark, bookshop, Heffers, Portraits of Pretence, print-on-demand, promotion, self-publishing

Great excitement: I have just been invited to participate in “What’s Your Poison?”, the summer crime party held by local bookshop Heffers.  I missed it last year, as I was away on my writing retreat, but this year the stars are in alignment and on Thursday 6 July 2017 I will be rubbing shoulders with fellow crime addicts and writers.  Do come along if you’re around: they are always lovely events, with some terrific books on show.  And I will be handing out bookmarks!

I have been asked to prepare a three-minute reading from my latest book, which is “Portraits of Pretence”.  I don’t do readings that often; when I am asked to speak (quite rarely these days, as I have not been putting enough effort into chasing speaking opportunities, bad writer that I am) I tend to focus on the process rather than the product.  And people are usually so fascinated by the mechanics of self-publishing and print-on-demand that we run out of time.

But I do know that choosing the right excerpt is quite an art.  You need something that can stand alone (I don’t like doing big explanatory introductions) and yet tempt your listeners to buy the book so that they can read on; that gives a flavour of the main character and perhaps a couple of others; and that hints at the plot without giving anything away.  I’m going to have to give this some thought…

Riches (are still) beyond my wildest dreams

Tags

ACX, audiobook, bookmark, cover, CreateSpace, sales, Smashwords

At this time every year, I have to face learning whether I can retire to a glorious chateau somewhere and devote myself to my Art, to my Muse, to my Writing.  For non-UK readers, we have a bizarre situation where our tax year runs from 6 April of one year to 5 April of the next.  (It’s all to do with an ancient new year’s day being on 25 March, and then the Gregorian calendar getting involved.)  And so around the start of May I dig out all of my records to find out whether I have made any money from being a writer over the past year.  Last year, you may recall, I made a loss of £44.87 – in other words, for the honour of spending hours and hours and hours on writing and trying to sell the blasted things, I had to hand over nearly fifty quid.

Would this year be any better, I wondered?  I added up all the royalties I have received from Amazon, Smashwords and ACX (for the audiobooks), and the lovely cheques I have received from bricks-and-mortar bookshops.  And then I subtracted all the things I pay for in order to create these books.  (I should say that I don’t charge myself anything for office space, heating, lighting, printer cartridges and so on, because all of that is charged to “other Susan” for my day job.)  But I do include, for instance, paying for the design of book covers and bookmarks, and ordering copies of books from CreateSpace to deliver to those bricks-and-mortar bookshops, and subscribing to the Society of Authors.

And I can report – taxman please take note and pity – that this year I have increased my loss to a rather worrying £288.71.  I have gone a bit mad on the covers this year (two paperbacks and two audiobooks), but still, it’s rather sad, isn’t it?  What I shall do is divide it by twelve, and reason with myself that my hobby is costing me only £24 a month.  Ho hum.

Bookmark bookkeeping

Tags

bookmark, G David, Heffers, marketing, promotion, sales, Samuel Plank

They’re done!  And here!  I have now taken delivery of 250 thick card bookmarks, printed in colour on both sides – quite the Rolls Royce of bookmarks, my dears:

I have already given ten each to the two Cambridge bookshops that stock the Sam Plank series – Heffers and G David.  I know that sounds a bit mean, as we imagine that bookmarks should be given away by the fistful, but – and I know plenty of you are interested in the commercial side of things – let me give you the figures.

The design of the bookmarks cost £79.  The printing and delivery cost £25.74, making a total of £104.74 for this first batch of 250 – which works out at 42p per bookmark.  Goodness, that’s a lot: perhaps I should have done those calculations before ordering!  But for subsequent orders – i.e. without design costs – it comes down to 10p per bookmark, if I order the same quantity each time.  The tricky thing, of course – all but impossible, I fear – will be to gauge whether they pay off in terms of extra sales.

Bookmarks the spot

Tags

bookmark, cover, marketing, Martha Plank, Plank5, promotion, research, Samuel Plank

It’s a strange old time, this just-starting-a-new-book phase, as there’s not much I can tell you by way of update.  For instance, I wrote about 600 words this morning, and spent rather too long finding out how coal was delivered (if indeed it was used domestically) in London in 1828, just so that I can could write the sentence: “Her grandson has offered to take me in his cart – he’s a coal man.”  As ever, I became fascinated by a totally irrelevant piece of history, and spent twenty minutes reading about how coal was measured (weight versus volume) in the nineteenth century, and how it was brought down to London from the north on boats called colliers.  That’s the trouble with historical writing: if you’re interested in history, every little detour is fascinating, and meanwhile poor old Martha is left tapping her foot and waiting for her lift in that cart.

One thing I have done this week is order some bookmarks.  If anyone professional shows any interest at all in the Sam books, I always pick their brains for promotional ideas.  And two separate booksellers have said that bookmarks are always very popular, and that a quality bookmark – i.e. on thick card, colour printed on both sides – will often reappear months later when someone comes into the shop and says, “I want the book on here”.  As you know only too well, I have no artistic talent at all, but thankfully my fabulous cover designer has plenty to spare, and in between covers (not bed-covers – book covers, you naughty people) he amuses himself by creating bookmarks.  And here is what he has done for Sam:

Aren’t they terrific?  I’m not sure which is the front and which the back, but I don’t think it matters.  I’ve ordered 250 – I can’t quite picture how big a box that will be, so here’s hoping I can fit it under the desk – and I’ll start sneaking them into local bookshops, handing them out to friends and so on.

(And in case you’re wondering, I still haven’t plucked up the nerve to hand out actual books – maybe it will be easier to hand out bookmarks, or leave them placed strategically on seats, or even tucked into other books in shops…)